We Have Nothing to Fear

but fear itself.

Since the beginning of Senior year, I have felt a shift within me. Something soft, something slow, but something deep. A fear has been building within me, uncertainty has clouded my judgment and thoughts. Where has this come from? Why now? School, I know school. People don't fear things they know, they fear things they don't. I have come to realize I am scared of the future. Utterly terrified. I keep working towards an unknown goal, driving down a road with a deep fog ahead of me. How do I know what I'm driving towards is where I want to go? I was told I am heading in the right direction, but there could be a cliff just meters ahead.

My brother often gets frustrated with my lack of confidence. With my academic history and activities, I have as good as a chance as anyone to get into a great college. However, I do not know for sure, and my uncertainty begets fear. Thus, I can empathize with Hamlet's uncertainty and angst, and feel Ethan Hawley's (The Winter of Our Discontent by John Steinbeck) hesitation to strive for success. As these two characters show, it is not the lack of fear which makes humans courageous. It is the willingness to persist in the face of fear, to continue on through the mist.

Nothing Like the Sun

Over the sixteen years of my existence, I have become aware of the human tendency to exaggerate. There is something about human nature that makes us want to portray things as something better than they are. It is difficult for us to accept things as they are, and be content with reality. In Sonnet 130, Shakespeare criticizes this behavior, emphasizing that people should take things as they are, nothing more. Love is a beauty enough itself, and doesn't need to be glorified by hyperboles. Thus the poet who says his mistress' eyes are like the sun doesn't necessarily hold his love in higher regard than Shakespeare who doesn't hold his to any false comparison.

This philosophy applies to aspects of life besides love as well. People who take life as it is, and accept the beauty in it are usually able to be much happier than those who try and set their lives to unattainable standards. Thus, I'll try and be content with life on Earth, even though its nothing like the sun.

I, Being a Senior and Distressed

I, being a Senior and distressed,
By all the commitments and work of my kind,
Am urged by your website to find,
Your campus fair, and feel a certain zest
To bear your course load upon my breast:
So subtly is the application of yours designed,
To clarify the pulse and cloud the mind,
And leave me once again undone, possessed.
Think not for this, however, the poor treason,
Of my stout blood against my staggering brain,
I shall attempt you with fear, or season
My insecurity with doubt - let me make it plan:
I find this frenzy insufficient reason
For hesitancy when we meet again.

Swinging in the Mist

As I have progressed through my various levels of education, I have noticed a definite shift in the last few years. While I once learned solid facts, now I am being taught the skill of trapping abstract ideas and applying them. As we are focusing on law, justice, leadership, and morality, all of these subjects seem increasingly abstract. Completely wrapping my head around one subject seems nearly impossible, as situations are presented which contradict each other entirely. It takes a human mind, the human spirit perhaps, to decipher each situation.

Oedipus and Creon do what they believe is right for society and the protection of their people. It is only for their lapses in judgment and emotional undercurrents that sway their decision that ends up being their downfall.

This presents the question, can we blame a leader for being human?
In economics, we have learned the most typical answer for difficult questions such as these is as simple as, it depends. Oedipus has the gods working against him from before his conception, while Creon crafts his own downfall through his actions. Is one leader better than the other? Perhaps. One may try and answer this question, but they are truly swinging in the mist, looking for something solid through the philosophical concepts that we focus on.