A Breath of Fresh Air

While with the Samanas, Siddartha wasn't content with his escapes from "self" as he knew he will always return back, no matter how pure he is while in meditation. This lingering knowledge prevents him from being fully satisfied by his practices and eventually motivates him to seek new teachings. Thus, Herman Hesse presents the dillema of being satisfied with content when struggle is just around the corner.

Over Thanksgiving Break, I have experienced a brief lapse from the struggles of "self" that accompanies school. Although I did not spend my weekend in meditation, I spent it with siblings and friends I had been missing. Fortunately, I didn't think about the work that is looming around the corner, and was able to enjoy myself. This might stop me from becoming enlightened, but I'm thankful for it.

Beauty in the Breakdown

In every great piece of art, it is the complexities that give it depth. Sitting underneath a starry sky, every human is awestruck by the sheer beauty of the universe. However, a scientist sees these freckles of light and knows what lies behind them, the reactions that drive them, can determine what planets surround them, and thus sees much more than suspended lights; they see textbooks, equations, and the complexity that make existence brilliant.
Every Science course I have taken has illuminated a new aspect of the universe that I was once blind to. In AP Biology, I became aware of the beauties and intricacy of life and how it began. Just the fact that helicase is unwinding DNA in my body as I sit to write this, and billions of charges are firing across your neurons as you read this is astounding. In AP Physics, I learned the laws that govern the universe. Just as the rules that govern sonnets make them special, knowing the principles of the cosmos, and being able to see occurrences that align to those principles makes the world that much more extraordinary. Like suddenly switching to color from black and white, I am constantly surprised by everything I wasn’t aware of.
As soon as the world is seen in this new light, it is impossible to be content with ignorance. Thus humanity constantly searches to know, to understand, and to unravel the intricacies that are woven in between what is, what was, and what is to be, making the universe more beautiful every day.

"The Rest Is Silence"

In my studies, there are no seperate sciences; theories apply to the entire universe and all that lies within, not just a specific area of focus. Essentially social science, physical science, and literary studies are all looking at the same thing from different points of view. Thus, a law of physics holds true to interations between people as well. The law of conservation says that energy cannot be created or destroyed, only converted into different forms.

A storm builds and grows until it finally bursts, spilling out all of its intensity on the Earth for a few brief hours. Finally, there is calm, there is silence. The potential energy of the clouds is released as kinetic energy of the rain failling towards the ground, and thermal energy is generated as well. Once the natural course of the world is disrupted as Claudius kills the King, a series of events gets set in motion that cannot be avoided. As the tension builds in the story, energy accumulates within Hamlet's angst, Laertes anger, Ophelias plight, and Cladius' guilt. The energy is released in spurts; Hamlet's play, Laertes duel, Cladius' prayer, and Ophelia's drowning each turn potential energy into kinetic energy, turning thoughts into actions, ultimately resulting in death for each of the characters.

Even though energy does not simply disspear, but passed on to the characters affected and the world altered, there is an end to the struggle that each character faces. For in death, "the rest is silence" (V, ii, 330)

While we discussed Seth Godin's "Dip" in class this week, I immediately thought of my experiences in Elementary School. When I switched from the 2nd grade to the 3rd grade side of my 2/3 split class, I found myself at the low point in the Dip. I had moved from the top of my class to the bottom almost instantly, and found myself struggling to achieve mediocre and low marks. I could have decided to return to my state of comfort and gone back to being in 2nd grade, but decided to stick it out. After a brutal year, I had caught myself up with the rest of the class, and began recieving high marks again from 4th grade on. I had made it through the dip and to the success on the other side.

The only problem I see in the "dip", is its deceptive nature. You can think your in the dip, for weeks, months, or even years, but truly be on the "cliff" or "Cul-de-Sac" route instead. Learning when to quit is something I need to do, especially as my workload increases while the number of hours in the day continues to stay the same.

Son of York

"Now is the winter of our discontent made glorious summer by this son of York,"
(Richard III)



As the solid foundations that I have relied on throughout my life begin to crumble beneath my feet, I have been looking towards a source of salvation. Unfortunately, looking backwards only shows how a mess was made and not how to clean it up, so I have had to look forward. With college on the horizon, my future is entirely in my hands. In the winter of my discontent, I must be the son of York - for only in my success can I ensure I do not fail, and unlike Allen Hawley, I will do so not by cheating, or stealing, but through my own determination and hard work.

Just as Hamlet goes through his own existential crisis of purpose and identity, answering prompts and choosing majors leads the two sides of myself to battle over my identity. Scientist or writer? Numbers or letters? However, I will not let this conflict, this hesitation, be my downfall. Either path I choose, I will not let any opportunity slip through my fingers like sunlight, for it has been a cold and dreary winter and summer is only seven months away.